Stalkers, Office Pool Characters, Barefoot "Danger" Spears

1. Who are you in your NCAA Office Pool and what are your chances of winning? Cracked breaks your office players down. If it wasn't for the fact that I've never seen a college basketball team play before, I would definitely be all about the pretty colors and be the Boss's daughter. I suppose that is the default category for idiots who go with places that they've been to before or sound cool.

2. Further proof that Trader Joe's has cult followers. Tracking Trader Joe's does what it's called: it follows where it goes, what it does, and what it has. This makes TJ the corporate version of Monica Crowley.

3. Gawker Stalker is probably the creepiest virtual stalker ever. Go to http://www.gawker.com/stalker/ to network with celeb-obsessed folks and see who's in your area today on the stalker map. Anyone can text message their sightings immediately, and apparently Gawker has hired extra staff to sift through these messages to keep the information on the site as close to real-time as possible. Man, to be unemployed and in the city...

4. Wonder what's irkin' Isaac Hayes's girkin'? Feel like a loser when people talk about the awesome South Park Scientology episode? This is why YouTube is awesome and you are never far away from being a culture junkie winner when online.

Um... no, not that kind of junkie winner.

5. Google will adapts its existing Google Base database into a new service allowing retailers to promote their products and their store on this site. This service that consumers can go to through Google's search engine is already available in the US and is rolling out in Europe and probably the rest of the world.

6. The Pentagon's defense scientists is scheming to make an army of "insect-cyborgs." DARPA, a defense research agency that works for the US military, wants to implant micro-systems into pupas in order to remote-control the insects when they develop for purposes of sensing certain chemicals and transmitting data. Dr. George McGavin of Oxford University Museum of Natural History scoffed, "What adult insects want to do is baically reproduce and lay eggs. You would have to rewire the entire brain patterns." DARPA's previous experiment of getting bees and wasps to detect explosives failed when "instinctive behaviours for feeding and mating... prevented them from performing reliably." (BBC News)

7. Britney Spears should really wear shoes as she, barefoot, stepped on a hypodermic needle in a parking lot in Hawaii. Her tests at Hawaii State Hospital showed the needle was unused.
(National Ledger)

8. Signing up to star in the Sin City sequel, Angelina Jolie will start work after birth of the Brangelina baby. She will be playing the role of A Dame To Kill For from Frank Miller's graphic novel. (The Sun)